Lyon Brave

6 months ago · 2 min. reading time · visibility ~10 ·

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I WISH I HAD AN INDIAN PARENT WHO PRESSURED ME TO BE A DOCOTR OR ENGINEER!

In this life we are all doing our best to get ahead, but our best is often not good enough to get out of poverty. -Lyon Amor Brave

As much as we like to bitch and complain about the government keeping the man down, the government is not the reason we struggle and are clueless about money and life.

The government was never in bed with you reading you bedtime stories and telling you to sleep tight and goodnight. The government never lectured you about life or told you stories about what school and childhood used to be like for them or what life would be like for you.

I WISH I HAD AN INDIAN PARENT WHO PRESSURED ME TO BE A DOCOTR OR ENGINEER!

Your framework of the world is largely due to your parents.

No matter how many Youtube videos you watch to try and get more insights about love and life, what you know is largely due to your parents influence.

The reason we are clueless about money is our parents are clueless about money and the best ways to make it and they did not teach us how to manage money properly or earn it because they did not know.

The truth is most people stay in the same financial situation as their parents as they become adults because we learn how to be adults from our parents. It is very bad news that we learn to be adults from our parents, especially if our parents are poor, addicts or just fundamentally dysfunctional because as the old saying goes, the apple does not fall far from the tree.

If your parents where flipping burgers to pay the bills, you will likely be found flipping burgers. It is not bad when you have parents who pressure you to go to college and get practical and high earing careers.

Looking back at my childhood, I do not think my parent’s taught me anything valuable about life other than how to cook. Because I never had ambitions of being a chief, culinary skills were not going to get me anywhere in this life.

We often hear stereotypes about Indian and African parents pushing their kids into the medical field to make money and we mock this parenting style and have empathy for their kids who are not allowed to dream outside of the practical box of engineering and legal careers.

I wish I had Indian or African parents who taught me to be realistic and practical and plan for my future with discipline.

My parents did not even teach me to drive, or have a plan for my future and because my parents had no plan for me and did not teach me about the hard realities of being an adult, I was basically setup for failure in my adult life.

Parents are meant to be mentors to their children. They should talk to them about careers and what is and is not realistic about life.

Yes, we have all seen the movie about the girl who wants to be a dancer over going to college, but movies are just movies. The overwhelming majority of us need to get off Instagram and YouTube and get a nursing degree or something practical to make money or we are looking at a life of minimum wage and living paycheck to paycheck and that is a very unpleasant life.

What is bad is when you have parents that never bring up your future even in your late teens.

A bad parent is a parent who does not help you get ready for the real world. -Lyon Amor Brave

An awful parent is a parent who never encouraged you to save money or get a job and throws you out at 18 before you are mentally or financially ready to be on your own.

Even if a teenager later overcomes the disadvantaged's of being completely ditched and abandoned and unprepared for the real world, the trauma they will experience from the unnecessary setbacks of early unset poverty will always scar them deeply, unless they are completely oblivious to their circumstances, which some people are and a certain amount of ignorance really is bliss.

Bad parents set their children up for unnecessary struggle and failure.

Good parents set their children up for success.



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Comments

Jerry Fletcher

6 months ago #5

#4
Thank you but I think she deserves the credit. Are you back in county?

Lyon Brave

6 months ago #4

Jerry Fletcher Congratulations for raising a brilliant woman.

Jerry Fletcher

6 months ago #3

Lyon, Your are correct. Children need a strong but yielding hand in my view. But when it comes to learning the value of work and sticking to it, actions speak louder than words. My daughter is a dual PhD in engineering and microbiology. We never encouraged her to be an engineer but we did expose her to science in summer camps. Her second PhD came about because she was one of few candidates that met the criteria for a program that had an engneering requirement.

Funmi Ade

6 months ago #2

Nice article. Certainly strong push, especially in the teen years is needed sometimes, to set one up for the future. I was able to complete an array of qualifications including an MPhil full time, while in full time work, because of the study culture I had imbibed growing up, due to my parents (Nigerian). I realise that now, not that I appreciated it at the time, this has helped me confront life's challenges. Thank God they didn''t fall into the Western think on raising kids. Of course there is no handbook and were far from perfect in my view. However, this aspect I cannot fault. The number one cause for failing PhDs in UK is because they're not completed, to combat this the number of years is gradually being reduced. SO I suppose there is a case for firm hand raising children, though it is somewhat unpopular now.

Paul Walters

6 months ago #1

Lyon Brave. Oh, you are back. Nice to have you here

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