Lyon Brave

4 years ago · 3 min. reading time · visibility 0 ·

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How to Surrender Your Pain by Lyon Brave

How to Surrender Your Pain by Lyon Brave

Some people say, control is rooted in fear. I guess it depends on what you are trying to control. Trying to control the religious and sexual preferences of others is certainly a fear based thing to do. We cannot control the habits of other people. Honestly, if it's not hurting us, it's none of our business how much someone drinks, jerks off, or goes to church. 

Honestly, if we would stop worrying about the mistakes other people make, or why so and so is this way, we would be a lot less exhausted and annoyed by others. People literally hold elaborate debates in bars about the lack of motivation of other people and how they can't comprehend how someone could be so unmotivated. The bigger questions is why is anyone worried about a strangers career choice, especially if the stranger is content with their choice?

A lot of what causes us pain is trying to control other people. Not only do we try to control their actions, but we literally get worked up if we can't control how people feel about certain things. We cannot control other people and we will never be able to control their minds and hearts. Attempting to control other people can only bring us pain, because we can only fail at it.

However, trying to control how the universe perceives you and what you do for a living certainly makes sense.  Trying to control your own thoughts and actions makes sense. Whether you go for a jog or not in the morning is in your control. A lot of your physical appearance is in your control, though we cannot all be super models. 

Because we are meant to be co-creators with god or the universe, desiring control is not a bad thing. Control is power. Control is influence. Being a control freak is our divine birth right as human beings with the ability to exercise our free will.

With that being said, there are many things about this world and our experience on earth that is out of our control. We cannot control if we are born male or female. We cannot control our race, our parental influence, or what country we grow-up in. We cannot even control how people treat us and who gives us the time of day. Life is luck. Life is chance. 


Honestly, a lot about our lives is out of our control. It's hard not to believe in destiny, when you realize how little you actually choose for yourself. With that being said, I want to mention Buddhism. Buddhist often talk of surrendering.  Buddhist believe the energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control.

Surrendering is how to stop suffering. You see we suffer because we desire things and when we don't get out desires it brings us great pain. Having a crush can be painful. We call it unrequited love when someone doesn't desire us back. This can traumatize many of us. This feeling of romantic rejection, but that is because we are not looking at the big picture. In the big picture, not sleeping with a girl or guy doesn't matter. Who we are is all that matters. 

What's cool about learning about surrendering your desires, is you can stop being in pain instantly. When a crush hurts you, consider this: Would letting go feel like freedom?

When wanting a certain career that doesn't seem to be happening,  consider this: Would letting go feel like freedom?

Christians will tell you to surrender to god. I will tell you to surrender to your own life. Surrendering is not a passive state. It should not be confused with giving up. Surrendering simply means to go with the flow and follow the path that is most natural for you. Sometimes our paths are filled with adversity even if we are supposed to walk them, but sometimes our journeys became impossible to walk because we are not meant to walk them. It's okay to give up your dream, to get your life back. 

In the same sense, if you are meant to move on from something being stagnant can start to hurt you. It's okay to not fight life, or yourself and to give up your pain. You can just let things go. Things you have held on to for years. This is how you find freedom. You move on from what is not yours, from what is over and done, from what is not working. You move forward. 

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Lyon Brave

4 years ago #26

Bernard Poulin I would really like it if you sent me a copy of your book. I am dying for a good English book.

You can't worry about what you can't control as it steals your hard earned energy. You can think, not worry, about you and what you can control. Surrendering your pain should be used as a reset button but not an "I give up button".

Jerry Fletcher

4 years ago #24

Lyon. Thank you for taking the time to delve into some of my posts. I hope you found something of use. I look forward to your notes as they are sometimes edgy and sometimes from the edge. Either way you are always intriguing.

Wayne Yoshida

4 years ago #23

So glad you clarified the part about surrendering vs giving up. I think this can be called -- "Satisfaction"

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #22

Jerry Fletcher Thank you for your encouragement. I will keep writing.

Jerry Fletcher

4 years ago #21

Lyon, congratulations for being able to put lucid thoughts into the world about how to cope with hitting the wall. You will find your way because you refuse to be trapped into thinking there is only one. I look forward to your further adventures and seeing where you emerge. You may or may not become rich and famous but keep writing because in that way you will continue to be influential.

Lisa Gallagher

4 years ago #20

Trying to 'be in control' all the time depletes a person of their energy. I like the message you presented on this buzz. Surrendering can mean giving in to your own desires too and that doesn't mean a person is selfish for doing so.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

4 years ago #19

Why worrisome. Would it not make you curious? Thinking differently can add to a conversation. Tc

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #18

Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt It would be weird if we did considering we have almost nothing in common. We don't have the same native language, parents, and we weren't raised in the same country. We are not the same gender or ethnicity. It would be worrisome if we thought alike

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #17

Bernard Poulin what was your last book

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

4 years ago #16

what is certain is that you and i think very differently.

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #15

Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt thank you for clarifying what you meant. You are getting into very abstract philosophical concepts like how do we know a tree really exist? No matter the structure of the universe or what role humans ultimately play in the universe, big or small, humans definitely can control some things. We can control to kill or not. That's a pretty big thing, humans choose. I know I have free will and choice over my actions because I have been hurt by poor choices and uplifted by better ones. I don't feel larger than life. I know I am very small if not insignificant in the big picture. However, I tend to focus on my life and what I can do in it and that makes me very powerful in my journey, because I am almost 100% focused on my own unique human experience. I am a very primal being, even primitive, worried about survival. Honestly, I am not worried about pondering these vague and abstract questions about the meaning of life. My take on spirituality is likely to be one of the most grounded earthy takes there ever was. With that being said, I can't control if it rains, who loves me, who hates me, if a meter destroys the earth, or if idiots make Donald Trump president. I could of spent the next four years super pissed about Donald Trump being elected lol. My point is you go to let things go lol...surrendering is facing reality and not living in a dream

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

4 years ago #14

"this will slide" as in this will move easily from thought into action.. Clarifying what i meant. It was careless of me. Quote "honestly a lot of our lives is out of our control".... " surrendering is out to stop suffering" I presumed that the basis was do not try to control what is out of control or what can never be controlled. What if "surrender" here means to surrender to the facgt that there is no such thing as "control". Just a predictable system co existing with countless unpredictable anomalies, including the human will. What if we are not the system but the anomaly that helps the system transcend. If we oppose the transcendence,we cease to be our natural selves.

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #13

This article never mentions anything being out of control, though it is talking about control and releasing the desire to control. Thus, there is nothing to let slide as there are no thematic errors or contradictions in thought. However, if we are assuming everything is out of control, this would clearly stem from a desire to control life and being uncomfortable with our lock of control instead of learning to flow is a source of stress and anxiety. Thank you Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

4 years ago #12

If one has to let go of the need to control, one shouldn't presume things as "out of control" . But this will slide

I guessed, it allows you to navigate everywhere!

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #10

stephan metral \ud83d\udc1d Innovative Brand Ambassador Sorry, that link is blocked too.


Check this....

Kowloon bayyyyyyyy, Morning Noodles, waiting for the ferry. Seems far from here. October, but that will do! Do you know what is Tor? And how you can benefit from it?

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #5

Chas \u270c\ufe0f Wyatt I don't know. I am pretty sure my dad is the type of guy to use blue herons for target practice.

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #4

stephan metral \ud83d\udc1d Innovative Brand Ambassador I am afraid I do not have vpn up and running yet and will not be able to check out your link until i go to Hong Kong in October. However, Yes. that sounds like a cool opportunity.

It started with blogging, this week we go for Facebook Live 24/7/365 with 62 hosts for live shows, including sponsored content. Recipe? Simple 3 Hosts, interviewing 10 guests about their business, passions, and projects! This one 24 longitudes all over the globe, which means MybeBeeTV make the world spin and is never out of the Air!

Howdy Lyon Brave, got somthing special for you! Check this : and tell me if a venture with you in China is in the decorum? LOL!

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #1

Kevin Baker Thank You!

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